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Video Store(ies)

September 18, 2012

During my first three years of college (and more recently from February to June) I worked at a video rental store.  Recent experience not included, it was pretty awesome.  I have decided to share some of the best and worst moments.

Let me first begin by listing what made the job so awesome the first time around

  1. Getting paid to essentially hang out.
  2. Being surrounded by candy.
  3. Getting rewarded when you were a royal jerk to customers with a lot of late fees.
  4. Watching my favorite movies while working.

Once more, this is the first three years, not the most recent excursion into video rentals…

First up, the day I was getting hit on by and older woman.  By older, I mean an easy 40 years older than me.  Extremely awkward.  I was behind the counter finishing up with a customer when she approached to make her move.  It seemed simple enough: she asked where a movie was located and then asked me to help her find it.  Completely normal.  Until I found the movie and handed it to her.  She then proceeded to rub my arm, wink, and ask me what cologne I was wearing.  She said I smelled “delicious.”  I almost died.

More awkward than the cougar would be the horny couple.  Yep… the horny couple.  I have to give it to them, though, they had no shame about it.  After scoping out the store for about fifteen minutes, they approached me to ask where the “adult room” was located.  Upon telling them we didn’t have one, the woman looked disappointed, but the man wasn’t going to let that stop them.  Without hesitation, he leaned in and said “Well can you point us in the direction of movies with the most nudity?”  Not wanting to make it more awkward than it already was, I grabbed a copy of Eyes Wide Shut and sent them on their way.One of my most favorite funny moments has to go to some uneducated redneck man in overalls.  Once upon a time, it seemed like every movie being released had subtitles (Letters from Iwo Jima, Pan’s Labyrinth, etc.) and we were required not only to tell customers as they rented the item, but also place signs near the rentals.  This time, Pan’s Labyrinth was the source of the drama.  I had opened and a man came in (in overalls) and rented the movie.  Of course, I pointed out that the movie was subtitled and he nodded and said he knew.  Color me shocked.  Well, he returned about thirty minutes later and was clearly upset.  Turns out, this man thought “subtitles” referred to the black bars on screen when watching a wide-screen movie on a full-screen television.  I was then informed that if he wanted to “read a movie” that he would find the library.  No kidding.  He wouldn’t go to the library, he’d have to find it.  The best part is about to happen, though.  I exchanged the movie for him… he chose Witless Protection with Larry the Cable Guy to replace Pan’s Labyrinth.  I mean really, I can’t make that up.

I could continue forever with stories very similar to these.  A short book could most likely be compiled in all honesty.  We’ll see… this may be a theme I continue with in the future if that is something you would like to read, just let me know!

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4 Comments leave one →
  1. September 18, 2012 7:49 pm

    You’re a funny writer. Your story reminded me of my days at Hollywood Video in CA. What fond memories!

    • September 19, 2012 2:06 am

      Thanks! Hollywood Video definitely had some memorable moments! Great stories!!!

Trackbacks

  1. A “Foreign” Language « jonathan crumes
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